When it comes to love, Somy Ali believes there are no guarantees. The Bollywood actor turned humanitarian explains that love, as with all emotions, has no external physical reality.
“It may be driven by neural events, but it is nonetheless a purely subjective experience. That is the ultimate truth for me. Bill and Melinda Gates got divorced after 27 years. My idea of unconditional love is unconditional is rare to find. It’s more of a quid pro quo situation nowadays. You give a little and I give a little. But I can’t put a blanket statement on this either because I’ve friends who’ve been married for countless years and then we hear stories of the elderly losing their spouse and 15 days later they die literally due to heartbreak and their inability to take the pain of their loss. For me all relationships are symbiotic. Once the honeymoon period is over, that’s when you can tell whether there is real love or not,” she says.
It’s not just romantic love, we all need human love too. Somy Ali agrees, “I fulfil that with NGO (No More Tears) by giving victims immense amount of love. Unfortunately, there are many who do not get romantic love, parental love or any kind of love at all. I recall in one of Simi’s episodes an interview with Zeenat where she asked her a very important question about love: “Did you ever feel loved.” And Zeenat responded with an honest, ‘No’. That honestly shattered my heart. One of the most beautiful women in the world and significantly educated to give that answer was shocking and heart-wrenching. Honestly, you’re fortunate enough if you find an individual who’ll not take advantage of you, let alone break your heart.”
Many feel social media has blurred the lines between real and fake. Somy opines that social media depicts everything we are not, quite literally. “Our fancy homes, our wonderful spouses, who would die for us, that many show off isn’t real. Social media is the equivalent to the movie “Stepford Wives.” Everything is perfect, yet there is so much turmoil in reality. No one wants to put their suffering on social media understandably so. A few women and men have, but that’s two percent of the rest who show you their perfectly manicured worlds. It’s all a farce and a façade in my opinion. I see it every day. Those men who depict their perfect lives, they are cheaters and have cheated and I know this for a fact. And, no I will not let bygones be bygones,” Somy Ali sounds disturbed.
Even if one falls in love, giving time becomes an issue. “There has to be a balance between a healthy relationship pertaining to work and giving each other time. This is doable and many couples make it work. I’ll use Deepika [Padukone] and Ranbeer [Singh] as an example. They seem to be the most exemplary couple when it comes to balancing their work and home,” she adds.
Many say love is an illusion. What do you think? “It depends on the individual. If you ask a monk, his answer will differ drastically in comparison to a hopeless romantic,” she says.
It’s often said that celebrities are always chasing fame, and they often don’t find love. “Musicians, politicians and celebrities are innately narcissistic human beings. Having said that, they will always choose what benefits them first. Sure, they might engage in flings and I have been a victim of that as a young adult, but ultimately they only care for themselves,” she concludes.
